Staving off Madness (Brenton/Rella)

[Harbor]

Rella could feel the stress of being virtually the only human in an elven capitol growing like lichen up her spine. She'd gotten half a paragraph of notice when Brenton disappeared. At first she had assumed it was his touch-and-go nature expressing itself, that he would be back soon, and that he'd explain to her just what she was supposed to do here. She had nothing to accomplish here, had no interest at all in ruling, and her usual pastimes she suspected would not be welcomed of someone in her position. A queen. Rella still shuddered at the word. But things needed to be done, and out of loyalty to her title even though they hated her race, those who served Brenton, his advisors, had begun coming to her when he left.

"No," she said firmly, when she realized that the first one was asking for a ruling. A decision. "Absolutely not. I will not be an acting queen. I don't belong here and we all know it. Find someone else." They had come to her more than once after that, to test her resolve and her response she expected, but it wasn't long before they did as she had told them to and solved their own problems without her input.

She had been moved from Isrydia's house to Brenton's after the wedding, and now she spent most of her time either hiding in her rooms, sitting half-concealed on the balcony, or sneaking out of the city as best she could. From the off she had suspected she was being watched, and finally she had assumed there was some arrangement of a guard that kept some form of eye on her, at at last she had decided she didn't care. They were far subtler about it than even she could have been. She almost never recognized the people she suspected of watching her. And even when she first left the city, as secretly as she could, and spent several days camping on her own amongst the lovely tall trees no one had tried to stop her or turn her back. She didn't know them, had never spoken to them, but that was enough for her to begin thinking of them with a kind of affection. When she spent a week walking to the nearest human town, a week there, and a week back, never did the elves she never saw but occasionally saw sign of give her the impression that she was doing something she oughtn't. For that she gladly tolerated them. Privacy could be pretended, and it was overrated anyway. Privacy was a state of mind.

When she was in the city, someone always informed her when Brenton had returned. She would hasten off to find him because she was worried about the distracted man he was becoming and because she thought she ought to, but she hadn't forced herself into his company yet. He had seems irritable, frustrated, at loose ends every time she peeked through his door, so she'd left him to what peace he could manage without her questions to bother him, and stayed within a communicable distance until someone came to tell her he was gone again.

Finally though, the boredom of never accomplishing anything dug its roots into her veins and bones and she had to see him. Dressed in her usual simple elven dress, she stomped off to see him, exasperated with what she expected was a mutual avoidance of each other. "Brenton," she announced when she finally found him, "please tell me there's a war on and you need my help to rally the unicorns or the werecats and werepixies or SOMETHING because if I stay cooped up here any longer waiting for your bad mood to pass I fear I will go mad. And not the CUTE sort of madness either; the kind where I tear my hair out and dance naked in sacred fountains and am arrested for treasonous blasphemy or some such nonsense." She planted her hands on her hips and regarded him tiredly. Boredom exhausted her.

[Brenton]

Brenton had returned only a day earlier from his journey through the lands of Alagaesia where he had calmed his mind and thought of all of the possibilities ahead of him. In that time he had gone from city to city and village to village, never staying in one place long for fear of hurting an innocent person who didn't bother him. He had even slaughtered a garrison of soldiers in the Empire just for attacking him when he had found Laetri but that had been one of his worst days with the cruxis crystal.

Now he was back in Ellesmera and thinking about how he had all of his soldiers waiting at the outpost in the Hadarac where he would rendezvous with them when the time came for the war. He would fight the battle with the Varden and Elves to clear out the Empire and then set out with Isrydia and Eragon to Ristvak'baen to destroy the accursed black magic that controlled him. Even now he could tell that while he should feel tired and a little upset or worried, all the king felt was devoid of emotion except for when he thought of Isrydia and Eragon.

They brought a semblance of humanity back into his life and made him actually want to be normal once more, if only so he could get to know them once again. Then there was his wife, Rella, who he had been avoiding every time he came back to the capital for fear that she would recognize his monstrous behaviors. He felt a small tingle of love flow through him at the thought of her but that was about all he could feel with the crystal.

Right at that moment, the king heard Rella demand to know if there was something to do because she was getting bored and he couldn't help but smile as he turned around to her. A beaming show of joy was across his face but that was exactly what it was, a show meant to soothe her nerves and calm her down. Of course there is something to do. That is if you wish to join me when I go off to war with the Varden. Our troops are stationed at the edge of the Hadarac Desert in an outpost built by Konner Derriksson who knew this day would come. They wait for my arrival in three days time to march out for Uru'baen where we will assault the northern wall and break through so that the Varden can get in. There we will meet up in the city and start the war. Unfortunately if you join me then it will be a long march and the battle will be my time to fight with the only other person like me. He is in the Empire and the greatest threat to the Varden but hopefully I am his equal and it will come down to who is more determined to win the battle. So that is what there is to do.

Brenton thought about it for a second and then looked at Rella affectionately for a second. He was the only elf in Ellesmera to be married since the elves were against marriage in their own beliefs but he was also half human and Rella was the right woman for him. Quickly he took her hand and squeezed softly. Forgive me Rella for not speaking to you the few times I returned but I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to control the madness within me currently. In a short period of time I will cure myself and then that will be changed but until then I can't say I am fully elfling. I have no humanity right now. Yet I do still love you and would like to make it up to you somehow.

[Harbor]

She honestly hadn't expected him to give in so quickly. Then again her expectations were built upon a shallow collection of the hours they had actually spent together in the last few months. She nodded. "Excellent. Will you let me fight? Or shall I have to pretend I'm capable of circumventing the guard I've noticed following me around since you've left?" She eyed him levelly, not accusing, merely stating facts, and ran a length of the wide ribbon around her waist through her fingers. It flowed there like water, finer--whatever it was--than any human-made satin she knew. "I have been fighting all my life and therefore believe I have the right to continue doing so." She lifted her head with a sudden epiphany. "I wonder if I could find any of your people here to spar with me. I could use the practice from someone I can't beat." She pursed her lips, wondering if anyone would consent to sparring fruitlessly--on their end--with the human queen most of them didn't want. "I shall consider it," she decided at last.

Seeing that his lap was empty Rella made sure his belt buckle wouldn't catch on her clothes and seated herself there. Brenton took her hand, and at his gaze she allowed a soft smile to touch her lips. Loving Brenton was....a difficult challenge, though were there any other kinds? He had been unpredictable and irrational since she'd known him, both traits that she was leery of in anybody, least of all a lover or companion. But it had been a lesson in patience, and tolerance, and she did find herself growing fond of him. What frightened her the most was that she could almost never properly understand him, and she couldn't properly trust that which she couldn't comprehend.

Lightly tapping his lips with one finger, she said, "Only kings and bards are known for making such speeches as you tend to. Don't worry about me, Brenton; I understand that there are magical things going on with you that I don't want to know about because frankly I don't like magic. I also understand that it isn't something I can help you with. And you don't need to make up for anything--I'm no better at relationships than I was when you met me. Having time to adjust to my new surroundings without needing to immediately adjust to you too has been helpful to what sanity I have. You don't need to make up for anything." She gave him a quick smile. "So when do we leave, O Unpredictable One?"

[Brenton]

Brenton felt Rella sit down in his lap and he couldn't figure out what to feel at that moment; joy, happiness, awe, love, vague sense of discomfort, all sorts of feelings could be inside of him but none of them seemed like something he would feel at the moment. So instead he simple wrapped one arm around her waist and sighed softly, trying to calm down from all of his constant moving around. He was home with Rella and they were having an okay time conversing with each other and that was all that really mattered to him.

Of course you can fight. I wouldn't have it any other way but do be warned that the retinue of guards around my half-brother are not to friendly towards me and my half-sister, Arya, isn't the most pleased with my actions so it may fall upon you. Brenton hoped that his sister would understand and not start anything while they were around her about anything to do with the king or who he decided to marry. Still he couldn't be sure so Brenton had warned Rella in advance just in case something were to come up while they were marching there or already there.

Brenton laughed when Rella worried about finding someone to spar with her and he pulled out Argetadurna from the sheathe right next to his throne. I will always be willing to spar with you but for someone else then I'm sure Konner, Arathale, Emiryal, Laetri, Anurin, Isrydia, Arya, or Eragon would be willing to if they are ever here when you wish to spar. That is if they all survive the war and decide to return to the forest.

We will be able to leave as soon as I have a pair of horses ready with supplies for our journey.

[Harbor]

Rella admitted that she appreciated his more recent, reserved attitude. His passion had worried her in its suddenness, because she couldn't understand it, but she felt terrible for liking anyone as someone thy weren't, in particular because it was magic that had made him this way. But then her opinion of Brenton had never been particularly clear, or solid. She never knew from one day to the next how she would feel about him. She couldn't even feel a difference in the shape of his lap as he sat there, which was a first--she had used the distraction of a woman sitting in an interested man's lap to her advantage more than once, of course none of those men had been under the thumb of magic before. She was glad that he put his arm around her, though. The man inside wasn't entirely lost.

At his promise she grinned. "I'm not the best diplomat but I'll do my best not to ruffle any unnecessary feathers. I don't need approval from anyone but I don't mind being nice on occasion either." At his next reassurance however she raised one brow and regarded him quizzically. "You want me to fight with the Arya and Eragon who openly disapprove of you and may yet rain their disapproval on me?" Perhaps the man within was yet slightly mad. She'd wondered, before the magic, if he might be anyway. He certainly acted like it sometimes.

"Excellent," she said in response to the timing of their departure. "Now help me out for a minute, because I'm not sure where the elven you starts and stops. Are you going to pitch a fit if I wear trousers or shall I put a skirt over them to keep your human side from thinking me a harlot?" She never fought in a dress or skirts if she could help it; she knew how, but that didn't make it safe, or comfortable. "And is there anything I can do to help pack, should I scurry away and pack my own things, or shall I continue to sit here and harass you?" Harassing him lightly could be fun, sometimes. Carefully.

[Brenton]

((Sorry if this post isn't up to par with the rest of mine but I'm currently fighting off the worst hangover I have ever had and my eyelids are fighting a coup de tau for control of my body. Complete mutiny between the headache and the eyes.))

Brenton sighed as he thought about what Rella said, waiting for her to finish entirely before even trying to think of a response. Surprisingly in his old days he would have interrupted halfway through to answer some of her questions but now it was simply just a moment of waiting for him. When his wife finally got to the end of everything she had to say, the king looked at her and opened his mouth to reply. Yet nothing would come past the tongue, or the teeth, or the lips. His throat and vocal chords were throwing a strike for all to witness.

So the king simply waved his hand, uttering a string of Ancient Language, and a glowing and pulsing orb of bluish gold light shot from the hand into the air. The light split off into three different orbs that started to circle each other, and finally they coalesced into one form. That form was his mother, the deceased Queen Islanzadi, who had never truly accepted him for who he was. Another spell created three more orbs that coalesced into the shape of his father, rider Brom, who had abandoned him at conception.

Brenton watched as the two stood in front of Rella and himself, not actually there and yet the closest he would get to ever seeing them again. Finally Brenton spoke softly, a waver to the words as they passed from his throat to the air around the king and queen. These two are my parents, Brom and Islanzadi. Both of them died after either not being around for me or not accepting who I was and so I never developed a bond with either of them. I never got to see my father for more than a couple minutes and my mother was too busy leading the elves before I took the throne after her death. Still I took their beliefs and character traits to heart. So to be honest even though I am half human, Brom never would have frowned upon women wearing pants and elves do it frequently which means that I am open to it as well. It is safer and in my opinion women should be treated as equals to men instead of as lesser than us just because you are more beautiful than we are.

As for Eragon and Arya, with that the two shapes turned into his siblings. They are not fond of me but they are also open-minded most of the time. Take Eragon for example. He is only against me because I am a son of Brom and he did not know that as well as the fact that I have a violent tendency at the moment. He hasn't had the chance to know me before the magic corrupted me. Arya is against me for many reasons but the main one, as far as I know, is that I left Ellesmera and then took the throne after coming back even though I am the second child of Islanzadi which gives Arya rights to it first.

[Harbor]

Rella jumped when Brenton's magic began swirling about--one of her least favorite things about living among elves was their proclivity for using magic incessantly. If the magic had a perceivable purpose she tolerated it with only a grim avoidance. Some of that magic was even pretty. But it never failed to make her purse her lips the way Brenton used it, seemingly without need or purpose every time, though she was sure he used it for good reasons at other times as well. Rella was just biased against magic, that was all there was to it.

After his explanations Rella was left with only one question. "Why did you take the throne if it belonged to her?" She could think of no good reasons. Of course in her mind, the best kings were those who didn't want to rule at all. Men who liked giving orders were frequently the ones who oughtn't be giving them.

"Is there anything in particular I ought to bring with me besides the usual traveling gear?" she asked then. "I don't believe my mace and spare castle will fit in my satchel but I've a few daggers that will come in handy."

[Brenton]

Brenton shook his head slowly as the figures fully disappeared and he heard the question from Rella. He had never wanted the throne, feeling like it was too likely that he would turn into Galbatorix. Still when Arya had been missing and no one had any idea where she was, he had been forced to take the throne as the next rightful heir. Arya was with the Varden at the time that I returned from the Empire and when I trained the riders that I did. She rarely visited her home and so I didn't know at first. Yet sometime she had gone after Eragon when he went missing. In her travels she disappeared and was believed to be dead or worse so I did what I had to do. As the next in line to the throne, I took the crown even though I felt uncomfortable about it and fought past my desires to give it to someone else for lack of wanting to be king.

She returned and I found out by taking a trip to the Varden but that was after my issues with magic and so now I feel she distrusts me more than when I was a child. It makes no sense that she can't see what I did was necessary and that I had no desire to be king after serving under a tyrant for so many years. Still she is family and so I accept that she doesn't believe me.

Brenton looked at what he used for weapons and then thought carefully about what he would take in Rella's position. Traveling clothes, a horse, food, water, scant medical supplies, armor, and weapons. I suggest a sword, bow, daggers, and possibly a short sword for if you have to use it in battle. That is what I would bring though and so if you want then you can switch up whatever you want.

[Harbor]

Rella hummed as she thought. ”That makes sense. Why didn’t she take it up when she reappeared?” She supposed one couldn’t be the ambassador, traveling all over the world, as well as trying to run a country all on her own. It was well known here that Rella didn’t want any of the responsibility that her position technically gave her, so she couldn’t imagine how Arya must feel. Granted, Arya was clearly a more upstanding person than Rella, and could probably handle it.

Rella could think of a few things that might have leaned Arya away from her half-brother, but she wasn’t about to mention them now. It just didn’t seem like a good time. Then again it may never be.

”So the usual?” she said in response to his packing list. ”I think I’ll leave the heavier weapons to you, with you being a bit more suited to them.” She smiled down at him. ”I think if I tried to wield a sword I’d lose a few toes, if not more.” Could be she’d lose half a foot or two, and pull a few muscles she couldn’t put back together. Bones tended to heal well enough, for her. Muscles still gave her trouble now and again. There was one in her lower back that ached every time she sat slouched for too long, but that had been her own fault.

Rella patted his shoulder, and slid off his lap to stand. ”I think I’m going to go pack then. Should I keep an eye on you to make sure you don’t sneak off again or will you behave?”